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for now that’s enough

March 9th, 2015 . Posted in blogging/internet, by Taylor, day-to-day life, food for thought, teen pregnancy & parenting, vent/rant, women | No Comments »

“Where’s my daddy?”

The three words I dread the most. The one question I will never have an answer for. It always seems to come on our roughest days, because he knows he needs more than I can provide, because he knows my weaknesses, because there are traits he didn’t inherit from me that I am clueless about, because sometimes you just need your dad, because there are some things that are inherently male that I will never understand.

Three little words encompass my greatest fears. Getting pregnant at 17 was scary but I knew I could love, provide and care for my child. Motherhood didn’t scare me, finding the words to explain to my child why he didn’t get a daddy, now that was terrifying. How do you explain to a child that his dad was nothing more than a child himself, that his dad wasn’t lucky enough to have the supportive family I did, that his dad was scared of the things he thought he could never provide? How do you explain that its okay to be mad and sad and confused about the whole thing? Without downplaying what happened to him and how he feels about it, without letting him think a father abandoning his child is okay, without making him feel like its his fault?

At first it was simple, he lives far away, he works alot, he loves and misses you. Now he is in school, and he will see other kids with parents who live out of town and work alot and who still see their dads. He sees people with not only dads but step dads too. Now he has learning to ask for him in another language.

“Ou est mon papa?”

How do I put aside my anger and frustration, my hurt and abandonment, and calmly rationally explain to my son why he has noone around to call dad. Because once upon a time I thought I was in love and we would in this together and now I’m here making excuses for your cowardness while you make jokes about how scary the words “I’m late” are as if you have any idea about half the responsibilities I have.

My initial reaction probably looks like I have just been slapped, and I quickly try to regain my composure, “He lives far away remember baby?”. For the moment he is appeased, for the moment that is enough, for the rest of our night nothing is different and yet he needs extra snuggles tonight, extra reassurance.

“You’re my best friend, je t’aime maman”

And for now that’s enough.

A Day In The Life..

December 22nd, 2012 . Posted in bySarrahbaby, day-to-day life | No Comments »
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This is my first post about a day in my life as a mom of three girls, a wife, and someone who stays at home. I don’t know how this will go because, in my opinion, my life is boring but I am hoping someone will get something out of it. Anyways, let me begin..

I woke up this morning after getting up twice in the middle of the night for my youngest to eat (8 months old) actually feeling like I got a good night sleep. I thought to myself, hey this might actually be a good day. I was wrong. Terribly wrong lol. My middle child, Elizabeth, woke up first. She woke up in a horrible mood. She was so mean and cranky. As soon as I brought Elizabeth out into the living room my middle child, Amber, woke up as well. So here I have two little girls who fight all the time cranky. Next thing I know I have a fight on my hands. Amber sits down to read a book and Elizabeth decides she wants the book.

Right now, my husband, David, and I, have been trying hard to find the right form of discipline to get through to our children because they have been out of whack lately.

So this time we tried just sitting them on opposite couches to calm down and wake up a little bit more. Well, this did not work. Anyone have any other ideas other than timeout, spanking, yelling, or taking things away??

So anyways the morning goes on and I keep trying to get the girls to calm down and be nicer and get along and listen so on and so forth. Lunch time comes around and the girls are still acting insane. Of course I can’t eat lunch until they get laid down for a nap because I will never get to finish it lol. So I sit the girls down and give them some Chicken Noodle Soup. Elizabeth throws it on the floor and Amber only eats two bites. So lately I am trying to get it across to them that they have to eat what I give them when I give it to them. They think they should be able to eat whatever, whenever, and wherever they want. So I put them down for their nap about 30 minutes early. Elizabeth goes right to sleep and Amber never takes her nap.

Luckily, and unluckily, David is laid off at the moment so he could stay home while they were napping (Chloe too) and I could go to the grocery store to get food for Christmas Dinner and my grandfather’s birthday dinner tomorrow night. THE GROCERY STORE IS JAMMMMMM PACKED!! I couldn’t even get to all of the things I needed because the store is so packed. Luckily when I come home the girls are still napping so I can grab a quick lunch and spend some time with David. That is what I wish happened anyways.

When I came home David was organizing things in the house and I got to work washing dishes and the counter tops. After about 30 minutes of that all three of my girls wake up. At that point I thought I would never get anything done. LUCKILY, my mom stopped by and I let her watch the girls in the living room while I got some laundry put in the washer/dryer and I finished up in the kitchen. NOW I can sit down.

Chloe is playing nicely in her jumper, Elizabeth and Amber are getting in trouble every few minutes. I cannot get these children to quit acting like this. And talk about RUDE. My oldest daughter out of nowhere has obtained the rudest nastiest attitude ever. It is horrible. Anyone else dealing or has dealt with this?? Please give me some advice lol. So we make the girls sit on opposite couches again and put a movie on for them. At that point it was time for me to start dinner. Holy geez non stop work lol. I have to keep leaving the kitchen to get onto the girls to leave Chloe and her jumper alone and to stop fighting because my Mom is playing on her cell phone lol. So dinner was suppose to be Italian Sausage. I had 6 links of it and 3 out of the 6 ended up burnt. Bleh.

What a day. Finally though we got to all sit down for Italian sausage, buttery pasta, and steamed green beans. It was a good dinner. Then the girls went off to play and I started dishes. David kept on organizing things this whole time by the way lol. Finally it is bed time (mommy relaxation time haha).

I sit down and play Call of Duty Modern Warfare with David for a little while and now as I write this he is watching How I Met Your Mother. I am going to sign off for now because I am exhausted from the kids behavior, shopping, and cleaning. Hopefully someone can give me some advice about the kids or hopefully someone got something from this. Like, life is exhausting being a mom but totally worth it. Good night all 🙂

March Break / Spring Break

March 16th, 2011 . Posted in by Kris, day-to-day life | 1 Comment »
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Well it’s a whirlwind at our house (as usual) and I know I haven’t checked in for a while (we’ve been sick) but I wanted to chat a little about March Break and what kind of activities you mommies did with your kids. What kind of child care do you rely on when they are not in school and what kind of activities do you sign them up for? For those of you with younger tots, this is something you’re about to get tossed into, so listen to what the older mommies suggest! lol 😉

I had been *really* stressed out about this coming week for basically all of 2011 to date!!! But it has gone really well so far. We had planned to send DS to the same camp as last year and now that he is older he could go to the full day option instead of just the half day for preschoolers. I called only last week to register (I know, a bit late) but luckily they had space. Luckily I had done my research and knew there was a discount for putting a camper in for the full week because the administrator distractedly tried to just charge me the daily rate x5! No thanks! My son *loves* the camp to bits. I tried to pick him up early on the first day and he would have none of that: “But it’s not pick up TIME, Mom!” and he sent me away.

As for my (much-older) DD, she wanted nothing to do with any camp. My DH joked that any idea coming from us, even if we could find a “sit around and go on Facebook and text your friends from your cell phone all day” camp somewhere, she would refuse to go just on the principle that it had been suggested by her parents. We are that hated and horrible these days. I offered her many many options including a babysitting course (you’d think the chance of making cash of her own this summer would be enticing! but no…), singing lessons, Hip Hop camp, dance camp, gmynastics camp (with or without her little bro), you name it – we researched it. But no, she insisted she wouldn’t have enough time to spend with friends or go shopping even if she were enrolled in a half-day program. And without her grand-parents to back me up (who had her more than half the week), I knew it was a fight I couldn’t win. If they were the ones having to drag her out of bed, you can be sure they would be saying “Don’t blame me, blame your big bad mommy who is making us all go through this camp thing” (have I mentioned this are my ex’s parents? her bio-dad’s folks? oh yes, it’s fun…).

But I did have a (small) victory this week… I suggested one morning that we go for a manicure at a local spa. “Invite a friend” I said, “My treat!”. She insisted everyone was busy, she wouldn’t be able to find anyone, blah blah blah. I asked her to put out a note online and on her texts and sure enough, there was a friend who was able to come along. So as usual, she ended up having a great time getting her nails done with her friend (and getting a Frappucino and having a leisurely chat session at the coffee shop) and it killed many hours during which she was not just moping around in her pyjamas bored.

Once the spring break is over for us, DD will go back to her dance lessons and we intend to put DS into gymnastics at the same place he’s done these camps a couple years in a row! They’re also both signed up for soccer this summer. We’ve had different sets of grand-parents help out with the “funding” of these activities because they can definitely get pricey, but I would definitely say it’s worth it. I started when the kids are young with little swim lessons and things like that (as babies, you go in the pool with them and then starting from around age 3, they go on their own) and it’s great to have one or two activities to keep them active during the week, especially when at least one of those extra-curricular activities is a sport or other physical activity.

So I suspect if the Question of the Month for March Roll Call on the YM Boards is about Spring Break, I can now just link over here! lol 😉 but either way, I’d love to also see some comments over here too from YM mommies and others… what do you usually do for March Break? What activities have you found to be good ideas for your kids during the year? What about summer? How do you keep them from being bored during the holidays?

I’m getting a 13y.o.’s smile again! =s

August 28th, 2010 . Posted in by Carla, day-to-day life | 1 Comment »
I have hated my smile ever since I can remember. I got braces when I was 10 and had them until I was 16. Yup, 6 years! My teeth weren’t horrible, but to make a long story short, I had a permanent molar that never descended, and had to change orthodontysts (sp?) like 7 times. Bringing the molar down to its proper location didn’t really take so long, but every time I changed dentits they would come up with a whole new plan to start over again!! at one point one of them actually did nothing but create a gap in between my front teeth that wasn’t there before!! and the other teeth flare out a bit! Urgh!. I’m sure the fact that I was a total slacker and always missed my appointments probably didn’t help matters.
Anyhow, the orthodontist decided to take them off saying they were doing more harm than good now (duh!). I got a retainer to help correct the “overbite” that twisting the tooth to position caused. A month later I accidently broke my retainer and I didn’t feel like going for another one.
Now here I am, almost 13 years after this begun, still hating my smile. Most of my teeth are straight except for a couple on my right upper side. I went in for a consultation earlier this week and found out my case is more complex that I thought. My old orthodontist didn’t do anything to make my jaw bigger & didn’t extract any teeth. My mouth is too small for all the teeth I have and will need at least 2 extracted. Plus I’ll have to have braces for another 1-2 years. The whole thing was a tough pill to swallow, but I decided to go through with it. I think it looks kind of funny when adults have braces, but I’m tired of hating my smile. Luckily the ortho said he’d be able to give me invisible braces! (the ones that go on the inside rather than the front of your teeth), or if I can’t afford those he can at least give me the clear braces in the front, but will need to use the metal in the back for the force. Wish me luck!
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