YMBlogs ~ young mommies' voices!

I will never forget the time I met Victoria… Specially because I was so nervious, it was like I had never seen or been around a child before!

Phill and I had been seriously dating for over 6 months, and she was just over 13 months old. We had discussed this over for hours and hours and hours! I was really looking forward to meeting her, almost from the start, but Phillip had a thousand reservations! (that I must confess I didn’t really understand at the moment, but now I see his point). We met at his house, and I remember being so nervious my hand were damp with sweat!! I kept dropping everything I was holding… She just kind of ignored me at first, and hung on to Phill for dear life!, and I remember thinking “Oh God, this s going to be a disaster!”. The first time I tried to hold her she started crying. Later we started playing with some cardboard boxes, and the Phill yelled at me cause he was planning to use them!, then we decided to get some lunch and she wouldn’t take anything!  So Phill got all frustrated and said that we better went home… At this point I almost felt like crying myself! and the thing is, I’m usually so good with kids! I adore them and they adore me!.   Thankfully little by little she started reaching out to me, letting me tickle her, and by the end of the afternoon she’d even let me hold her! but still, I was SO awkward with her! it was embarassing! you’d think I had never been around babies before! Not knowing what to do, how to talk to her, how to calm her down… I really thought Phill was going to come up to me any minute and say “You know what, I don’t think this is going to work” (I’m SO glad he didn’t obviously!)

That’s when it hit me! all the pressure I was putting on myself, because this wasn’t just some kid, just another friend’s child… This is the daughter of the man I love! and if everything turned out the way we wanted to, she was going to be my family! My step DAUGHTER! yikes! and you can imagine what a shock that was to me at first… I remember when we said good bye I patted her awkwardly on the head and didn’t even kiss Phillip, I was so out of my element!

Then I thought, if I want this child to be my family, I had better start treating her like family! and that made a world of difference! the next time we met like 2 weeks after that we really started bonding! we went for ice cream, I made her laugh, she made a mess of my dress and broke my necklace, you know, the whole thing! hahaha! But I’m glad to say we’ve been friends ever since. =)